Does the Perfect Pill Exist?

Does the Perfect Pill Exist?

Posted by Ben Emerling on 12th Apr 2017

Of course, the limitless pill doesn’t actually exist, and probably never will. No pill will ever give a man or woman superhuman abilities. However, there are many pills out there that may make you feel unstoppable. I do not recommend going out and abusing pills to find out whether this above statement is accurate, because as you know, what goes up must come down. For me, Adderall was this perfect pill for a long time, until it eventually turned into poison.

An estimated 2.5 million Americans are prescribed amphetamines (such as Adderall or Ritalin) for the treatment of Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder or ADHD. ADHD is a mental disorder that makes it difficult to concentrate, and increases impulsive behavior. In college, this drug might be considered the “study drug.” Let me tell you, this drug really works. If you have ADHD and are prescribed any amphetamine for treatment of the disorder, it might be an incredible first. But if you do not have ADHD or even have Attention Deficit Disorder (without the hyperactivity), this drug can cause adverse effects.

My experience with Adderall

My parents took me to a psychiatrist as a young teenager because they suspected I had ADHD. I wasn’t a hyper kid, but I always had an extremely hard time paying attention and finishing tasks. The doctor prescribed me Adderall, and it was a monumental change in my life. I hated how the drug made me feel at first, but at the same time loved how focused and alert I was at all times. When the pills wore off, the crash was awful, but I managed.

At first, I had no idea Adderall was an addictive medication, or even mood altering. I took it as prescribed and went on with my day. It was around that same time period I started smoking pot regularly. It was the perfect combination, because the marijuana solved all the problems Adderall caused. For example, stimulants such as Adderall are notorious for bad crashes, loss of appetite and sleep issues. Well, smoking weed seems to “cure” all of those problems. As time went on I became more and more addicted to both substances.

As with every drug or substance, a tolerance built up and I started to need more to feel the same effects. I didn’t even realize I was abusing the drug, and getting high from it. I would even snort the pills from time to time, and take it when I didn’t even need it. It still seemed like the perfect pill though. I felt like I had an unfair advantage because it made me way more focused in every part of life. As I grew older, I noticed this more and more.

Adderall addiction side effects became very much a part of my life. I started having irregular sleep patterns and weight loss, and eventually, this magical pill stopped working.

The Imperfect Pill

Adderall addiction is a serious matter, and I found out the hard way. When I finally was left to my own devices at college, I dove straight into the grips of addiction. I was a binge drinker on the weekends and throughout the week I was always high on some sort of pill. College was the moment I was waiting for: I was finally able to get as high as I wanted, so I did.

Welcome week of college started August 25th. By October 25th I had partied harder than some in their entire lifetime. I did every drug I could possibly get my hands on, drank like a fish and made sure to be intoxicated 100% of the time. Obviously, this couldn't end well.

Adderall, which I thought was perfect melody to all my drug abuse turned on me. See, I had a system: I would wake up take as much Adderall/speed as possible, and then take downers the rest of the day to calm down and eventually fall asleep. Then I'd wake up and do it all over again the next day. My life turned into a living nightmare when I ran out of downers. I stayed consistent with my Adderall addiction, but eventually ran out of my downers. Towards the end of my using days, I had a 90 day script left of Adderall, and no money for food or more drugs. The three month supply of Adderall was gone in less than a week.

During that week I didn’t sleep. By the end of the week I was in the psychiatric ward. I experienced very real auditory and visual hallucinations, and experienced many other Adderall addiction signs. Thankfully, I didn’t die. I knew a major lifestyle change had to happen if I ever wanted to feel normal again.


It has been seven years since I picked up a drink or a drug. After the psych ward, I admitted myself into treatment, where I spent basically the entire year of 2010. The hallucinations eventually went away, and I slowly returned back to my old self, without alcohol or drugs. For the first time since I was a little kid, I was sober from everything, and living without the vices.

They say that when you get sober, you start at the age when you started using. For me, I started when I was about 13; so needless to say, I had a lot of growing up to do. I was 19 at the time, and basically the only thing I knew how to do was act like a drug addict. Through AA meetings, the help of a sponsor, and lasting sobriety, I slowly turned into a productive member of society. I went back to school, got a college degree, worked several internships and currently hold a job at rehab Placement Company. The wild thing is, I did this all without that “perfect pill” I had used for so long.

Recovery is an amazing gift. When I was getting high, I had no friends; I isolated myself from my family and was completely spiritually broken on the inside. But after some intense work on myself and my behavior, I have accomplished the impossible. I no longer obsess over getting high, and my life is full of peace and contentment. All I ever wanted was happiness, and I thought I was finding it in pill form. In reality, all of the genuine happiness I have ever experienced was through sobriety. I now know my purpose on this earth, and it is to be an example that recovery is possible.

Ben Emerling is a content writer based in Metro Detroit. Blogger by day and avid sports enthusiast by night, Ben uses his creative writing skills to help others achieve Having previously interned for 12up, Ben dedicates himself to health, wellness, team sports, and living sober. Check out his sports articles, and say hi on Facebook (link to fbhere)


Product Reviews